Songs for a Break-Up

One of the delightful side effects of my relationship with G, especially during those first couple of months when we were crazy twitterpated for each other, was that all the love songs I heard on the radio suddenly made sense. They expressed how I felt.  I was part of the club they were singing about.

After the relationship ended, another set of songs took on meaning for me--those about heart break and lost love.  In the weeks following our break-up, I was in a dark place.  My self-confidence was low and my hope for the future was virtually non-existent.  Struggling to keep my spirits up from moment to moment, I latched onto a few songs I kept hearing on the radio that had a line or refrain that captured how I was feeling and gave me the boost I needed to keep going.  

Here in no particular order are some of the songs that I identified with.  FYI, singing along at the top of your lungs in the car really does make you feel better, even if just for that moment. 

"Try" by P!nk
What it's about: This is a quintessential post-break-up heart-break song.  Pink sings mournfully about a past love, wondering what he's up to, and finding the strength to get on with life in spite of heart-break. (Caution:  The video (linked above) is full of not-very-subtle sexual innuendo as well as some really cool dance moves.)
Key lines:  

"Where there is a fire there is gonna be a flame.  
Where there is a flame someone's bound to get burned.  
Just because it burns doesn't mean you're going to die.  
You've got to get up and try, try, try.
You've got to get up and try, try, try."

Best for:  ...those moments when your insides hurt so much with heartache that you think you're going to burst.  It gives you that momentary push you need to wipe away your tears and get out of bed.

"Blow Me One Last Kiss" by P!nk
What it's about:  Another favorite by P!nk, this one is about that period when the relationship is unraveling and its end is in-sight.  The song's dance-house tempo and throbbing drums give resolve to the decision to end the relationship and press ahead as a strong person. (Caution again:  Use of the s-word in the lyrics.)
Key lines:

"Eyes on fire, eyes on fire,
And they burn from all the tears.
I've been crying, I've been crying, 
I've been dying over you....

"I think I've finally had enough.
I think I maybe think too much.
I think this might be it for us.
Blow me one last kiss." 

Best for:  ...any time before, during, or after the break-up when you need to be pumped up and energized to get through the day (or just the next hour).

"Rolling in the Deep," "Rumor Has It," and "Set Fire to the Rain" by Adele 
(Really, Adele's entire second album was written about breaking up and any song on it will hit home in that situation.)
What they're about:  Adele sings about breaking up with such ferocity and gut-wrenching honesty, it's hard not to be drawn into these songs even if you're not going through a break-up.  The first two have a strong "it's your loss, dude" element to them, which is especially great when you're the dumpee instead of the dumper.  "Rumor Has It" doesn't describe my situation at all--G certainly didn't leave me for a younger woman--but I love Adele's sassy attitude in the song.  While these are girl power songs on some level, they also give you permission to sit in the pain of your break-up for awhile and mourn the loss of the relationship.
Key lines:

"The scars of your love remind me of us.
They keep me thinking that we almost had it all.
The scars of your love, they leave me breathless.
I can't help feeling, we could have had it all."

And

"When laying there with you,
I could stay there, close my eyes.
Feel you here, forever.
You and me together, nothing is better.

"I set fire to the rain
And I threw us into the flames.
Where I felt somethin' die,
'Cause I knew that that was the last time, the last time."

Best for:  ...allowing you to feel the intense pain of a break-up by giving voice to your emotions and, if you sing along loudly, letting you release some emotional stress too.  Also great songs to listen to while working out (which is always a good step towards putting yourself back together after a break-up).

"Catch My Breath" by Kelly Clarkson
What it's about: Clarkson sings with passion about a resolve to take control of her life and be her own person.  It's a terrific affirmation of the power of the individual to break free from others' expectations and pursue your own dreams.  To me, it also speaks of recovery and getting back on your feet after a set-back.
Key lines:

"Catching my breath, letting it go,
Turning my cheek for the sake of the show.
Now that you know, this is my life, 
I won't be told it's supposed to be right.

"Catch my breath.
No one can hold me back,
I ain't got time for that. 
Catch my breath.
Won't let 'em get me down.
It's all so simple now.
It's all so simple now."

Best for: ...Any day you need a boost, energy, or to be reminded that you have the potential to be great.  (It'll also pump you up at the gym.)

"Titanium" by David Guetta featuring Sia
What it's about: This electrifying song is all about the power we have within us to overcome obstacles, stand up to bullies, and triumph over the nay-sayers who try to keep us down.  (Warning: The video may be disturbing in the wake of the school shooting in Newton, CT, last year.  I think the song is about so much more than what is depicted in the video and that the video is just one narrow interpretation of the song's meaning.  I do LOVE this song, but it might be better to just listen to it than watch the video.)
Key lines:

"I'm bullet-proof,
Nothing to lose.
Fire away, fire away.
Ricochet, you take your aim.
Fire away, fire away.

"You shoot me down,
But I won't fall.
I am titanium.
You shoot me down,
But I won't fall.
I am titanium.  
I am titanium."

Best for: ...any day when you just don't have the energy to get out of bed and face the day, whether break-up-related or not.  This is a great one to listen to before going into an intimidating situation or conversation.  The song reminds us all that we're strong, incredible beings and can handle anything that comes our way.