I've been home from the magical land of New Zealand for just over a month now and, to be honest, I've been grumpy for most of it. Rather than revel in the awesome experience I'd just had and think fondly on my memories of the trip, I've dwelt on the comparative tedium of day-to-day life, the daily grind of job, grocery shopping, getting the car's oil changed, fitting in a workout at the crowded gym (b/c it was too cold to go outside), sitting in traffic, cleaning the bathroom. For nearly three weeks in New Zealand all my senses were alive and actively nourished. How can real life in dreary winter gloom compare to that?
Speaking of winter gloom, I've spent a lot of time blaming Mother Nature for giving us a March full of winter when I wanted and expected it to be spring. The cold weather seeps into my bones and adversely impacts my mood more and more each year, in spite of having grown up in a place that gets a serious dose of snow every year. One evening, after the third snow storm in as many weeks, I left the house to find more whispy flakes softly falling. Instead of marveling at the beauty and stillness of it all, I looked up and shook my fist at the sky, angry to still be dealing with winter at the end of March. By going to New Zealand in February, I was supposed to escape the end of winter, not just take a break from it!
Somewhere in the midst of my angry self-pity, I read a story about girls in Africa who are still subject to female genital mutilation. I heard about families and homes lost in mudslides in Washington state. I saw story after news story featuring anxious and hysterical people whose loved ones have mysteriously vanished in a plane over the ocean. I took dinner to women who are overwhelmed by trying to take care of their children, prepare for a new baby coming soon, and get their house ready to move as soon as the baby arrives.
It's humbling.
If the cold weather is the biggest thing I have to complain about, my life is pretty amazingly good. How easy it is to get mired in my first-world problems. My day-to-day life might be tedious but it is nothing compared to the stress and tragedy and fear that many people live with every day, even that I have experienced at times in the past. I will never be subject to female genital mutilation (thank goodness). I have lost no one in a mudslide or plane crash and all my personal property is intact. I live very comfortably in a safe area and I have a good job. Oh, and I did just have a spectacular, life-changing vacation in New Zealand. I really need to remember some perspective.
I still reserve the right to be grumpy about the winter in the future, at least until I can figure out how to support myself while chasing summer across the hemispheres year-round. I'm sure this isn't the end of my weather-related grumpiness this year, but I'm getting better at reminding myself that I really have it very good.
Speaking of winter gloom, I've spent a lot of time blaming Mother Nature for giving us a March full of winter when I wanted and expected it to be spring. The cold weather seeps into my bones and adversely impacts my mood more and more each year, in spite of having grown up in a place that gets a serious dose of snow every year. One evening, after the third snow storm in as many weeks, I left the house to find more whispy flakes softly falling. Instead of marveling at the beauty and stillness of it all, I looked up and shook my fist at the sky, angry to still be dealing with winter at the end of March. By going to New Zealand in February, I was supposed to escape the end of winter, not just take a break from it!
Somewhere in the midst of my angry self-pity, I read a story about girls in Africa who are still subject to female genital mutilation. I heard about families and homes lost in mudslides in Washington state. I saw story after news story featuring anxious and hysterical people whose loved ones have mysteriously vanished in a plane over the ocean. I took dinner to women who are overwhelmed by trying to take care of their children, prepare for a new baby coming soon, and get their house ready to move as soon as the baby arrives.
It's humbling.
If the cold weather is the biggest thing I have to complain about, my life is pretty amazingly good. How easy it is to get mired in my first-world problems. My day-to-day life might be tedious but it is nothing compared to the stress and tragedy and fear that many people live with every day, even that I have experienced at times in the past. I will never be subject to female genital mutilation (thank goodness). I have lost no one in a mudslide or plane crash and all my personal property is intact. I live very comfortably in a safe area and I have a good job. Oh, and I did just have a spectacular, life-changing vacation in New Zealand. I really need to remember some perspective.
I still reserve the right to be grumpy about the winter in the future, at least until I can figure out how to support myself while chasing summer across the hemispheres year-round. I'm sure this isn't the end of my weather-related grumpiness this year, but I'm getting better at reminding myself that I really have it very good.
1 comment:
me thinks you need a weekend away somewhere to recuperate...or something
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