There's a new guy at work who, in spite of being very smart and having a college degree, continues to use the word myself incorrectly. Frequently. Multiple times per day. In both email and spoken conversation.
Typical sentences include: "Please reach out to Lisa or myself if you have questions."
And: "Myself and my assistant will be coming to this meeting."
And: "At some point this week, Ricky, Marni, or myself will stop by to discuss the issue."
This drives my inner prescriptive grammar nerd crazy.
It drives me so crazy, in fact, that the other night I dreamed that I was lecturing a woman I'd just met about the proper use of myself. You know you're really irritated when you start dreaming about it!
What better way to get this out of my system than via my only real platform for being bossy to the masses, aka this blog? Feel free to close your browser window now if this does not interest you. Or keep reading. You might just learn that you've been making this same error all these years too.
The terms myself, yourself, himself, herself, ourselves, etc., are all reflexive. That means that when a verb is involved, the terms reflect back on the person speaking or about whom you are speaking.
I can give something to myself.
I sometimes talk to myself.
You can injure yourself.
That guy singing on the subway can embarrass himself.
See what I mean about reflexive? All the action reflects back on or goes back to the do-er.
This means that:
I cannot give an award to yourself.
Correct: I can give an award to you.
Further: I can also give an award to your kids, neighbors, and you. It doesn't matter how many people I'm giving this award to--yourself is not one of the recipients. You are. Congratulations!
You cannot ask myself a question, just like I cannot ask yourself a question, so please don't tell me to.
Correct: You can ask me a question and I can ask you a question.
Further: You can ask my sister, her husband, and me a question. Just don't ask myself a question because myself cannot answer. I can answer the question you ask me. I hope it is thought-provoking.
Myself cannot stop by your office to discuss the issue. Myself also cannot go to a meeting with you.
Correct: I can stop by your office and you and I can go to the meeting together.
Further: You, Tom, Amy, and I can all go to the meeting together and discuss the issue. Yourself, himself, herself, and myself cannot go to a meeting or discuss anything. Afterward, let's all go out for beverage or snack to recover from the meeting. We could even talk about ourselves over drinks.
See how simple and wonderful correct grammar is? It's music to the ears. Especially if you are singing the music to me and not to myself. Now where's that beverage...?
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